Category Archives: red sox suck

Scientific Breakthrough!!

Monkey teaches Red Sux fan sign language! Until now, Red Sux fans have not been unable to demonstrate the brain function necessary for basic communication until the age of 12, but after months of isolated interaction with a reeses monkey, a six year old Sux fan has responded to a request to take his first bath. -Lou Score


Red Sux fans put the ASS in CLASS…

Today, as I listened to the incoherent Yankee-hating rant left by my boss on company voice mail, I cannot say that I was surprised. The inferiority complex that reeks through every word from a Red Sux fan, having been built up over decades of losing, only compares to the penis envy felt by a post-op tranny after realizing he/she made a really bad mistake. Since Boston has achieved a modicum of success, listening to a Red Sux fan wax poetic about the sport of baseball is like being lectured about making money by a trailer park resident who won the lottery. I would offer some advice to this group, but it would just be forgotten when they wake up from their daily alcoholic black out… -Lou Score


This rare display of excitement is a far cry from how Mannie Ramirez normally composes himself while playing in left field, where he is known to be much more calm and collected. Never getting too anxious when a ball is hit in his direction, or at least not enough to exceed a light jog. This gentleman of the sport is truly refined, setting an example for children and men alike. – Lou Score

Best Sport Montages of All Time-Number 5……..Footloose

I know what you’re saying, Footloose isn’t a sports movie? Well my friends 4 words, Kevin Bacon Male Gymnast. Throw a few random football scenes and interpretive dance, and I think we have something that could be seen on ESPN8 THE OCHO.

One kid. One town. One chance.

When teenager Ren (Kevin Bacon) and his family move from big-city Chicago to a small town in the West, he’s in for a real case of culture shock and local towns folk with bad dancing abilities. Though he tries hard to fit in with the simple life, the streetwise Ren can’t quite believe he’s living in a place where rock music and dancing are illegal. WTF right? There is one small, yet curvy pleasure, however: Ariel (Lori Singer), a troubled but lovely blonde with a jealous redneck boyfriend. and a Bible-thumping minister played by Harry from the Hendersons, who is responsible for keeping the town dance-free, YES, Dance free!Ren and his classmates want to do away with this insane ordinance, especially since the senior prom is around the corner, but only Ren has the courage and big heart to initiate a battle to abolish the outmoded ban and revitalize the spirit and kindred of the repressed townspeople and high school kids that want to bump and grin, R Kelly Style.

Here is Number 5-Footloose (1984)

Maybe the most Ass kickin, but very gay dance montage I have ever seen. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to be Kevin Bacon after seeing this, but I would have tamed a few of the moves. Enjoy

Tomorrow, number 4….Vision Quest