Bill Raftery is the Ballz

I am sitting (Thursday, Febuary 21st @ 7:55pm) in Newark airport waiting for my flight back to the Cuse when Bill Raftery walks in……..This is what entails

Raftery to Jakes coffeehouse clerk- “Can I get a coffee, or are you closed?”

Jakes coffeehouse clerk-“We are closed, but I will give you a cup of coffee!”

Raftery to Jakes coffeehouse clerk-“Super young lady, you are simply suuuuuuuuuuper!”

(I did not make this up, I was 2 feet from the entire exchange!)

Some of the Best Rafterisms in the past 20 years…………………….

“A little pirouette, and they said this was a beer town!”
“I wheel the wheel barrel down the street to the tin!”
“Give it to the big fella!”
“Send it in, Jerome!”
“The Big Guy”
“With disdain to the tin!”
“Send it in, Verne!”
“…with the kiss!”
“With the sweet kiss, off the glass…”
“With a little dipsy do”
“The vegetable cart”
“Put a little english on it”
“With the teardrop, that’ll make you cry”
“Panties on the deck”
“We got a little nickel-dimer here”
“The small change”
“With the blow-by”
“With authority!”
“Send it in, big fella!”
“From the Right Wing!”
“There’s a little lingerie on the deck”
“The bounce to ecstasy”
“You might call this Newton’s Law!”[1]
“Most unattractive but beneficial”
“With the dribble drive”
“Attacking the tin!”
“Strong… to the goal!”
“Bring your lunch!”
“(insert co announcers name), (insert team name) goes man to man!”
“They’re playing a (insert zone defense name) zone with man-to-man principles!”
“A little ricochet romance!”
“Get the puppies set!”
“He can do it all; let him into the band!”
“(insert player’s name) with some early onions!”
“Fill the lane! Provide the lift!”
“He can make you ask for your mommy.”
“Walter at the altar: High Mass!”
“Bottle of blackout!”
“Divine intervention!”
“With a little smoocher!”
“Protect the women and children!”
“Chubby Checker Do the Twist!”
Vern Lundquist: “I hope Dwayne Wade likes cajun cooking!” (dramatic 5 second pause, Bill Raftery: “JAMBALAYA!”
“A Large Edifice!”


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